This is the final week of the five-part series of Marriage Monday questions. These questions, written by the blogger at Today's Letters, are designed to draw you into a simple, yet bonding conversation with your spouse. It facilitates communication that creates deeper intimacy. If you are just now joining us, you can read the posts in order, starting with the first question.
To recap, here are the five questions:
1) How did you feel loved this past week?
2) What does your schedule look like for this upcoming week?
3) How can I best love or encourage you this upcoming week?
4) How do you feel about our sexual intimacy and how can we work together to strengthen it?
and finally...
5) How can I pray for you?
You will then pray for each other, out loud, right then and there. This question may seem like the easiest, but it is surprisingly hard for many people. You may pray for your spouse all the time, but praying in front of your spouse, for your spouse, is often awkward. First the sex question, and now praying out loud! When will the awkwardness end?!
The only reason why I'm asking you to push through and try it is because revealing your heart to your spouse will bring about intimacy like you've never experienced before. It builds intimacy when you tell your spouse what is burdening your heart. When your spouse then prays for you right in front of you, it builds even more intimacy. It is incredibly bonding.
If that isn't reason enough, here's another great one. We are called as Christians to share each other's burdens (Galatians 6:2). Especially in a marriage, if your spouse is stressed about work, dealing with a health issue, heartbroken about a rift in a relationship, fearful, overwhelmed, or burdened in any way, you took a vow to walk alongside them in that time of need. You should be the first person to wipe away their tears, listen to them, encourage them, and especially pray for them.
Many people are not used to praying out loud. It is also hard for many men, because they feel pressure to be the spiritual leader, yet so often the wife is the one with more experience praying out loud in groups. Wives - please do not criticize or make fun of your husband's first attempt to pray out loud in front of you. Doing so will guarantee he will never want to do it again.
Praying is simply talking to God, so there's not a right or wrong way to do it. No need to be eloquent. In fact, start out simple. The first week you can each give one request for the other to pray about. Even now, my husband and I usually just give three requests, but feel free to spend as long or as little of time as you want on this one. I'm often surprised at what my husband reveals to me as the top three things that are burdening him. I'm super thankful to have that insight and be brought in to the inner workings of his heart and have the honor of praying over him.
If you need extra motivation to try this, let's think this through. After talking about question #4 you will have sex on the brain. You will then immediately follow that up by praying for one another, so you will feel incredibly emotionally close as well. You will feel super bonded at that point, so you will most likely want to jump into bed together. You're welcome.
Thanks for joining me for the Marriage Monday series! I would love to hear if you've attempted it and especially if you've adopted it as a weekly ritual with your spouse!